I am a spiritual person with longing for spiritual growth but held back because of work pressure and aspirations of making my family happy. My father passed away on 22 Feb 2014, and I quit engineering due to severe mental health issues I was having (which continue partly today too). I also lose gurus or fight with them recurrently despite not wanting to and meaning the best. I lose touch with friends. I am also deeply lonely and i want to settle down with a nice man (I'm gay), but I am afraid of losing status/respect in society since I belong to a once rich family, and therefore I always disconnect before things get too serious in relationships. I also have interest in art, astrology, and religion, and I love staying in my house.

want to know about these

I am a student preparing for UPSC civil services and have 3 attempts. I will give UPPCS prelims in Oct/Dec 2024. done my post graduation in Political Science

Death, Cause unspecified November 1918 (in Paris, France, age 64),Astrologer,Cult leader,Number of Marriages (Moira),Mystical experience (Link with the Secret Chiefs),Begin Major Project 1888 (The Golden Dawn),Celibacy/ Minimal (Religious celibate marriage),Founder/ originator (The Golden Dawn),Marriage 1890 (Number of Marriages)

Death, Cause unspecified 25 July 1928 (In Paris, age 63),Astrologer,Cult leader,Number of Marriages (One, celibate),Spiritualist,Mystical experience (Chanelling discarnate masters),Mystical Experience 1891 (Channeling Secret Chiefs),Celibacy/ Minimal (Religious celibate marriage),Sexual perversions (Tantric sex with elementals),Marriage 1890 (Number of Marriages)

Metaphysics/ Parapsychology,Metaphysical (Rosicrucian mystical order),Mystical Experience 1909 (First initiation),Begin Major Project 1904 (Founded Psychic Research center),Founder/ originator (Founder of AMORE),Meet a significant person 1908 (Met May Banks-Stacey, silver messenger)

Actor/ Actress,Family large (11 siblings),Parents divorced (Age two),Mate - Noted (Dates Brad Pitt),Cult follower (Church of Scientology),Published/ Exhibited/ Released 1987 ("Home Fires"),Published/ Exhibited/ Released 2000 ("Room to Rent"),Collector (Antique clothing),Meet a significant person 1989 (Brad Pitt),End significant relationship February 1993 (Brad Pitt),Marriage 9 September 1999 (Skateboarder Steve Berra)

Death of Significant person 3 July 1971 in Paris (Jim Morrison, heart attack, age 27),Entertain Producer (Music),Group/ Duo (The Doors),Instrumentalist (Guitar),Song writer,Abuse Drugs (The '60s),Kids - Noted (Son Weylon a pro musician),Twin, triplet, etc. (Twins),Meditation,Published/ Exhibited/ Released 4 January 1967 ("The Doors", first album released),Published/ Exhibited/ Released 25 September 1967 ("Strange Days", second album released),Published/ Exhibited/ Released 12 July 1968 ("Waiting For The Sun", third album released),Work in team/ Tandem (Band),Gain - Financial success in field,Culture Collection

Death, Cause unspecified 30 August 1917 in Bude (Age 57),Sales (Traveling salesman),Researcher (Reincarnation, karma),Astrology,Autobiographer,Publisher/ Editor (Publisher),Astrologer (Pro),Marriage more than 15 Yrs (Married 21 years),Stress - Distant (Platonic marriage),Theosophy/Vedanta (Theosophist),Same Job more than 10 yrs (Salesman over 10 years),Celibacy/ Minimal (Marriage said to be non-sexual),Top 5% of Profession,American Book,Begin a program of study 1877 (Karma and reincarnation),Meet a significant person 1890 (H.P. Blavatsky),Marriage 1896 (Bessie),Trial dates May 1914 (Tried for fortune-telling),Trial dates June 1917 (Tried for fortune-telling)

Death of Mate 30 August 1917 (Alan Leo died),Astrology,Publisher/ Editor (Editor),Astrologer (Pro),Marriage more than 15 Yrs (Second marriage 21 years),Marriage less than 3 Yrs (First marriage six months),Stress - Distant (Celibate marriage),Widowed (1917),Theosophy/Vedanta (Theosophy),Constitution sensitive (Poor health),Celibacy/ Minimal (First marriage six months; second celibate),Top 5% of Profession,Occult/ Misc. Collection

Psychic/ Medium/ Spiritualist (Psychic),Psychic

Death, Cause unspecified May 1949 (Age 84),Astrology,Astrologer (Pro),Mate - Noted (Max Heindel),Number of Marriages (One),Long life more than 80 yrs (Age 84),Theosophy/Vedanta (Theosophy, Rosicrucian),Published/ Exhibited/ Released 1936 ("Astrology and the Ductless Glands"),Founder/ originator (Co-founder of Rosicrucian Fellowship)

Death, Cause unspecified 6 January 1919 (Age 53),Astrology (Books),Astrologer (Pro),Number of Marriages (One),Theosophy/Vedanta (Theosophy, Rosicrucian),Published/ Exhibited/ Released 1916 ("Astrology and the Ductless Glands"),Expatriate (Netherlands and U.S.),Founder/ originator (Co-founder of Rosicrucian fellowship),Top 5% of Profession,American Book

Fundamentalist/ Evangelical (Taliban),Terrorist,Joined group 1999 (Joined Muslims in Kosovo army)

Group/ Duo (The Incredible String Band),Instrumentalist (Guitar, panflutist and sitar),Vocalist/ Pop, Rock, etc.,Cult follower (Scientologist),Joined group 1965 ("The Incredible String Band")

Death, Cause unspecified 23 January 1983 (Age 96 in Auckland, NZ),Religion/ Philosophy (Theosophical),Long life more than 80 yrs,Clairvoyant/ Clairaudient,Theosophy/Vedanta

Death, Cause unspecified 5 March 2012 in Chicago (Age 83),Psychotic Episode (Aware of his duality),Schizophrenia (Dementia proecox),Bone (Broken arm),Surgery (Tonsillectomy),Change in family responsibilities February 1932 (Brother Jere born),Memories Bad (Mom mentally-physically ill a lot),Order of birth (First of two boys),Difficult birth (Forceps, long and difficult labor),Western (Devote R. Catholic),Accident (Non-fatal) 1938 (Locked in car trunk two hours),Race (White),Thief/ Financial crime (Thief),Homicide serial (Sadist and serial killer),Prison sentence (Three life terms),Torturer/ Sadist (Tortured and dismembered victims),Criminal cases (Serial killer; book about case),American Book,Deinstitutionalized - prison, hospital 19 January 1945 (Released from probation),Secrets revealed 25 July 1946 (Confessed to murders),Assault/ Battery Perpetration 17 June 1942 (First arrest),00 AM (Beat, stabbed and killed Mrs. Josephine Moss),00 AM (Beat, fractured skull of Evelyn Peterson),Assault/ Battery Perpetration 1 October 1945 (Shot Veronica Hudzinski, she survived),Assault/ Battery Perpetration 5 December 1945 (Shot Marion Caldwell, she survived),00 AM (Stabbed, shot to death, Frances Brown),35 AM (Suffocated to death Suzanne Degan, age six),Arrest 26 June 1946,Trial dates 4 September 1946 (Three life sentences)

Death, Cause unspecified 26 May 1976 in Freiburg im Breisgau (Age 86),Administrator (Chancellor of University),Teacher (Public school),Religion/ Philosophy (Questions of being),Architect/ Planner,Foster, Step, or Adopted Kids (Foster-daughter),Kids 1-3 (Three),Number of Marriages (One),Long life more than 80 yrs (Age 86),Philosopher/ Humanist (Philosopher, existential),New Career 1922 (Teacher),Published/ Exhibited/ Released 1927 ("Being and Time"),New Job April 1933 (Chancellor of University),Exceptional mind (Foremost thinker and philosopher),Vocational award (22 architectural awards),Historic figure (Intellectual giant),Culture Collection,Joined group 1933 (Joined Nazi party),Marriage 1917 (One, lasting)

Death of Significant person 15 May 1940 in Amsterdam (Willem Adriaan Bonger),Death of Mate 15 September 1942 in Amsterdam (Julius Philipp Spier),Death of Father 10 September 1943 in Auschwitz,Death of Mother 10 September 1943 in Auschwitz,Death by Homicide 30 November 1943 in Auschwitz (Victim of holocaust, age 29),Autobiographer,Short Life less than 29 Yrs (Age 29),Western (Jewish),Published/ Exhibited/ Released 1981 ("Het verstoorde leven - Dagboek van Etty Hillesum"),Concentration camp (Killed during holocaust),Other Famous (posthumously),End a program of study 4 July 1939 in Amsterdam (Master in Dutch law),Begin a program of study 9 March 1941 in Amsterdam (diary),Institutionalized - prison, hospital 6 June 1943 in Westerbork (decided not to flee, but to stay with her imprisoned family),End a program of study 6 September 1943 in Westerbork (Diary),Institutionalized - prison, hospital 7 September 1943 in Westerbork (forced transport to Auschwitz),Great Publicity 13 February 2013 (honoured woman by Pope Benedict XVI),Meet a significant person 14 May 1940 in Amsterdam (prof Bonger , a day before his suicide.),Meet a significant person 3 February 1941 in Amsterdam (Julius Philipp Spier)

Death, Cause unspecified 18 December 1803 in Weimar (Thüringen),Religion/ Philosophy,Poet,Philosopher/ Humanist,Historic figure